Best Gay Hookup Sites and Apps – 11 Ways to Find the Perfect M4M Fling

October 19, 2019 / Tony

In the US, it’s estimated that 20% of all online dating profiles are looking for same-sex partners. That’s a lot of guys! As someone who’s spent a lot of time traversing gay dating websites and sex apps, I’ve learned a thing or two about looking for gay love online. Alas, no gay app or website will ever be perfect (there are dickheads on them all!) but some are definitely better than others.

In this list of gay dating apps and hookup sites, I’ve tried to cover all the bases. Whether you’re looking for casual sex, cruising spots, or a long-term commitment, this list of the best gay websites has got you covered. A few of these sites require subscriptions, but many are free or have decent free versions available. So, what are the best hookup sites? Which gay app is best? Let’s dive in!

Best Gay Dating Sites and Gay Hookup Apps

1

Adult Friend FinderBest Gay Hookup Site Overall

Highlights & Features
  • Designed with casual sex in mind
  • Lots of gay singles and gay couples looking for hookups
  • Tailored toward a more mature audience
  • Mobile options available
  • Live cams and “member videos” available too

Although often associated with straight people, Adult Friend Finder (AFF for short) can be used as a gay hookup site just as easily, featuring a ton of gay singles and couples looking to organize hot sex. AFF is a bit of an all-in-one website – it gives you the ability to plan gay sex hook-ups, set up dates, watch live webcams and watch member-generated porn too. Don’t let the lady on the homepage fool you – this is a brilliant gay hookup site.

Pros
  • Versatile website – cams, videos, chat, hook-ups
  • Great for organizing sex sessions
  • Options for trans people too
  • Everyone is there for the same reason (sex!)
Cons
  • Not an exclusively gay platform
  • You have to pay for the better version
  • Asks some intrusive questions
Our Rating of Adult Friend Finder
2

Out PersonalsBest Gay Personals

Highlights & Features
  • Great for personals, whether you’re hooking up or looking for a relationship
  • Aimed at “out” users who don’t need to be discreet
  • Comes with additional features such as “hottest user photos” and “hottest user videos” sections
  • Dick pics galore
  • Webcam flirting options

On Out Personals, everyone seems to have their dick out! If you’re looking for a no-nonsense free gay personals site, Out Personals is the site for you. You’ll find a mixture of smiling faces and exposed penises as you browse through the member’s area, taking in the various profiles. I would say that Our Personals tends to attract an older audience, so bear that in mind if you prefer younger blokes.

Pros
  • Easy to flirt via messaging, live webcam chat, photos, and more
  • Scroll through profiles looking for local hook-ups
  • Free option available, although basic
  • Brilliant for casual encounters
Cons
  • Very complicated site layout – needs to be simplified
  • Website has a somewhat spammy feel
  • You need a paid membership to do anything decent
Our Rating of Out Personals
3

GrindrBest Gay Hookup App

Highlights & Features
  • Find users based on your current GPS location
  • Fast and easy messaging
  • Closest users come up first
  • Free and paid-for options
  • Can be used for discreet gay dating

Grindr is known for its unique grid layout system, showing men who are closest to your location first. This makes it great for hooking up with guys in your local area and you can also choose not to use a display picture, keeping things discreet if necessary. Grindr bios allow you to tell people facts about yourself such as whether you’re a top or bottom; whether you identify as a “bear”, “twink”, or “otter”; and what your HIV status is. Out of all the dating apps gay men use, Grindr is probably the most popular and well-known.

Pros
  • Easy to find gay men near you
  • Simple layout and detailed bios help you to find men who just want sex or men who want to date/chat
  • You can see who’s viewed your profile
  • One of the most popular gay hookup apps in the world
  • Paid version lets you scroll infinitely
Cons
  • Lots of competition – people can lose interest quickly
  • Not ideal for dating
  • Free version has ads and limitations
  • No Grindr online – it has to be an app downloaded onto your phone
Our Rating of Grindr
4

OkCupidBest Gay Dating Site for Long-term Love

Highlights & Features
  • Asks you many personal questions about your values and what you’re looking for
  • Matches you to hot men in your area who have similar interests and desires
  • Ideally used on a PC/laptop, although a mobile version exists
  • Wide age range and plenty of diversity
  • Can be used to look for hookups and fuckbuddies, but designed with serious dating in mind

I’ve used OkCupid a few times and I’ve always found it to be one of the most wholesome gay dating sites out there. There are straight people on this site too, but the LGBTQ+ men on OkCupid are usually looking for serious dating and long-term relationships. When making a profile, the site asks you a series of questions about your stance on politics, religion, smoking, finances, and many other serious lifestyle factors, helping you to match with someone who has the same values and beliefs as you. You can also search for specific subjects to find guys who like the same things as you – some of which are very specific. Sadly, not many men share my love of ’90s Heavy Metal. It was worth a try.

Pros
  • Aims to match users based on their beliefs and values
  • Tends to skew toward liberal, open-minded people
  • You can search for men with your interests
  • Multiple fun features for matching with people
  • Free version is still really good
  • Bright and vibrant color scheme
Cons
  • A fair amount of dead profiles
  • Not many people in more remote areas
Our Rating of OkCupid
5

SniffiesGreat for Finding Gay Cruising Spots

Highlights & Features
  • Shows you local users and cruising spots on a world map
  • Tells you how far away the nearest known cruising spots are
  • Lets you “lurk” as a completely anonymous user
  • Simple and easy-to-understand layout

Sniffies is a website that specializes in telling you where the local gay cruising spots are. If you’re the kinda guy who likes to do things old school, Sniffies can direct you to your nearest glory hole, cottaging toilet, or public sex park. It’s definitely not everyone’s cup of tea, but it’s a great way to experience homo hook-ups the old fashioned away. After all, cruising is just that little bit more exciting than using an app!

Pros
  • Browse your local area anonymously
  • Find out where your local cruising spots are
  • See men near you on a detailed map
  • Not as spammy as many similar sites
  • Easy to use and navigate
Cons
  • Limited user base in some areas
  • User profiles are a little too simple
  • Needs some additional features in my opinion
Our Rating of Sniffies
6

HornetVersatile and Top-rated Gay Community App

Highlights & Features
  • Gay community app – basically a social network integrated with m4m dating
  • See what users near you are posting about and talking about
  • Stay connected to LGBTQ+ media and stories
  • Can be used for hookups, dating, chatting, and scrolling through social media feeds
  • Very good way to feel engaged with your local LGBTQ+ community

More than just a simple gay dating app, Hornet is basically Facebook meets Grindr. You CAN hook up with nearby men, but it’s not the main focus of the app. Hornet is basically a social media network for LGBTQ+ men in your local area and beyond – you can see the stories, posts, and photos that local LGBTQ+ men share. This can give you a more organic way to meet men and strike up a conversation. Despite all this cool community stuff, you can also message the user base on a Grindr-style messaging page, complete with naughty pictures that can be unlocked if the user decides to let you see them.

Pros
  • Stay connected to your local LGBTQ+ community
  • Find interesting ice breakers and things to talk about with men near you
  • Split between Grindr-style messaging system and Facebook-style social network feed
  • Feels very pleasant and wholesome
  • Versatile gay app dating – can be used for multiple things
Cons
  • Premium version is better (but requires payment)
  • Not the largest user base
Our Rating of Hornet
7

CraigslistBest Free Gay Personals Website

Highlights & Features
  • Totally anonymous gay sex
  • Can also be used for rent boys and escorts
  • Easy to organize local hookups and sex parties
  • Tends to be frequented by slightly older users

If you’re looking for anon gay sex in your local area and you’ve exhausted the gay dating apps, Craigslist is a great solution. Although this infamous website had to shut down its “personals” section due to trafficking concerns, Craigslist hookups live on in the “activities” section. If you go to the activities section in your area and filter it for the word “gay”, you’ll see tons of free gay personals of guys looking for casual sex in your town.

Pros
  • Easy to remain anonymous
  • Ideal for discreet hook-ups
  • Can be used for rent boys and escorts too
  • Very popular, especially in towns with a large LGBT+ community
  • Choose to share your approximate location on a map
Cons
  • Can feel a little seedy
  • Some posts seem a bit dodgy – you need to use your intuition
  • Overall website design is very dated
Our Rating of Craigslist
8

Adam4AdamGreat for Gay Dating and Flirting

Highlights & Features
  • 5 different grids to explore – find out who’s closeby, who’s visiting, who’s new, who’s popular, and who’s featured
  • 27 filters for age, height, body type, ethnicity, and more
  • Unlimited chat and photo messaging
  • Also has a gay sex shop and gay webcams

Becoming somewhat of a powerhouse in the gay community, Adam4Adam now has a sex shop, cam boys, its app, a porn site, and much more. It’s available online as well as for your smart device, so you can use it in the most convenient way for you. It can be used for casual sex or for serious dating, as they say on their homepage, you can find “Mr. Right” or “Mr. Right Now”. As an app, it feels very similar to Grindr. In fact, it has more options and filters than Grindr!

Pros
  • Like Grindr, but with more options and fewer timewasters
  • Versatile gay site – ideal for both dating and as a one night stand app
  • Many different filters and grids to explore guys with specific interests and intentions
  • Very popular in urban areas
  • Quick and easy to get started
Cons
  • App is a little glitchy and hard to use
  • Profiles could be more detailed
  • Adam4Adam porn site cheapens the feel of it a bit
Our Rating of Adam4Adam
9

Gays2FuckTop Gay Fuck Site

Highlights & Features
  • Filters guys according to what you prefer (twinks, bears etc.)
  • Allows you to choose to view men with a “big dick”, “tight ass”, or “hard abs”
  • Lets you browse pictures of attractive fellas who match your criteria
  • Designed with hook-ups in mind

Gays2Fuck is an unusual gay hookup site, as it narrows down your choices straight away into twinks, bears, and “everyone”. This seems a little bit broad in my opinion when there are so many different types of gay men out there. The site is very open about its purpose (gay sex) but it does feel a little dated and clickbaity.

Pros
  • Unique idea and style
  • See fellas who you’re likely to be attracted to
  • See naked pics straight away
Cons
  • Feels too good to be true
  • A little clickbaity feeling
  • Asks for your credit card for age verification but claims “not to charge it”. I don’t trust that shit!
Our Rating of Gays2Fuck
10

GaysTrystBest Gay Dating Site

Highlights & Features
  • Filters for appearance, unhealthy habits, religion, body type, sexual orientation
  • Tailored toward gay dating more than hook-ups
  • No sexually explicit pictures allowed
  • Simple and intuitive layout

It feels like there are a million gay cruising apps out there, but what about gay men who are looking for dates and emotional intimacy? We do exist! GaysTryst is a new gay dating website that has a rule against sexually explicit photos. This makes it perfect for finding a partner without blokes trying to send you unsolicited dick pics 24/7!

Pros
  • No dick pics allowed – most users on GayTryst are looking for serious dating
  • Gay-exclusive dating website tailored to LGBT+ needs
  • Easy to filter through guys you’re unlikely to get on with
  • Find Mr. Right online
Cons
  • You need to pay a fairly steep subscription fee
  • Not many users if you live in a less populated region
Our Rating of GaysTryst
11

Jack’dBest Diverse Gay App

Highlights & Features
  • Worldwide messaging – speak to locals in different countries before you arrive at their location
  • Known for ethnic diversity
  • Location-based chat – speak to users near you
  • See who’s viewed your profile
  • Data and insights on how often users respond
  • Multiple profile pictures in grid layout
  • Anonymous browsing options

Jack’d is one of those apps like Grindr which uses a grid of guys near your location, except that the user interface isn’t quite as sleek as Grindr’s. However, it does give you the ability to go on a “global” messaging system where you type in the name of a city and speak to fellas at that location. If you’re planning a trip to NYC, for instance, you can organize to meet with locals before you even get there. Jack’d also prides itself on being super diverse, and I was pleasantly surprised to find that that’s true. Most of the fellas I came across on Jack’d were Asian, Black, or Mixed Race, so it’s definitely popular with queer people of color.

Pros
  • Popular with LGBTQ+ people of color – very diverse user base
  • Talk to users in your trip location before you get there
  • Free version is pretty good and paid version is decently priced
  • Unlimited messaging
  • Can log in via Facebook if you can’t be bothered making an account
Cons
  • Can’t unblock people after blocking them
  • Unable to take screenshots due to security policy
Our Rating of Jack’d

Gay Sex Site Honorable Mentions

There is an absolute shitload of gay apps out there these days, so I couldn’t fit them all into this list. However, here are a few honorable mentions that may be worth checking out!

Squirt – Squirt is a relatively new free dating site without any payment, though it’s mostly used for local hookups

Tinder – There are tons of gay Tinder users who use the famous “swipe right” app to look for love, relationships, and dating

Silver Daddies – Silver Daddies is an old-fashioned gay personals site aimed at mature men and their admirers, many of whom are younger twinks/sissies

Nasty Kink Pigs – In case the name didn’t give it away, Nasty Kink Pigs is a hookup and sex website aimed at homosexual men with kinks and fetishes like leather and BDSM

Scruff – Scruff is a Grindr alternative which tends to be aimed at older men and more traditionally “masculine” men, although they’ve become more inclusive in recent years

Growlr – Growlr is a gay sex app that is designed with “bears” in mind. If you’re a large, hairy man, or you’re into large and hairy men, Growlr is a great place to frequent

r/Bros4Bros – r/Bros4Bros is a subreddit where male homosexual Redditors can post their naughty pictures and flirt with other members

Recon – Recon is a gay sex website for fetishists, leather daddies, BDSM fans, and men looking for master/slave relationships

Tips for Creating Your Profile on Gay Hookup Sites

It’s hard to sell yourself to potential husbands on gay dating sites, so here are some tips to help you cut through the competition with a brilliant online dating profile.

1. Get a friend to help you

I know it’s a cliché, but well-established gay dating sites like Match.com always recommend getting a friend to help you create your dating profile. Why? Because as human beings, we have a tendency to focus on the negatives aspects of ourselves that we’re trying to improve. On the other hand, a good friend can easily identify your positive traits and features from an outside perspective.

2. Use 4 pictures in different settings

If the app/website allows it, use 4 pictures for your online dating profile. Professional matchmakers recommend using 4 pictures taken in different settings and at different angles. The goal here is to show different aspects of your life (i.e. social life, everyday life, hobbies) without coming across as vain or self-obsessed.

3. Have specific interests

I hate seeing profiles that list their interests as “Food. Coffee. Movies”. Yawn. That could mean 1,000 things. Are you into Mediterranean food? Arabica Coffee? Austrian Science Fiction Movies from the 1930s? Give people something more specific to break the ice with!

4. Check your spelling

Some people, like myself, are total Grammar Nazis, so you might want to consider checking your spelling and grammar before publishing your profile. Integrated spellcheck apps like Grammarly can help you out if you’re not great with words. Sloppy spelling and bad sentences can make you come across a bit dumb, which is not ideal when looking for love.

Tips for Using Gay Hookup Apps

With apps like Grindr and Jack’d, finding “hot men near me” has never been easier. Nonetheless, there are still some basics rules to follow which maximize your chances of finding casual gay sex in your area!

1. Don’t send out mixed messages

If your bio says that you’re “just looking for friends”, but your profile pic is you posing in a skimpy jockstrap, it comes across like you don’t know what you want. Don’t say one thing but imply another!

2. Face pic is always better

We get it, some men are looking for a discreet gay hookup experience. Still, if you’re out of the closet and you don’t care if local people see you on an LGBTQ+ app, then a face pic is much more trustworthy-feeling.

3. Be careful how you state your preferences

We all prefer certain body types and appearances, and that’s totally fine, but be careful about how you state this information in your bio if you don’t want to look super bigoted. For example, the phrase “no fats, no fems” became a popular meme in LGBTQ+ culture after many Grindr users were criticized for using it. It’s fine to not be attracted to Black men, but saying “No Black men” in your profile is rude.

4. Take a decent dick pic

I know we’re not all Annie Leibovitz, but some basic photography skills can go a long way. There are many websites featuring guides on how to take a dick pic, so you’ve got no excuse for a garish photo of your Johnson. Personally, I would say shoot it from below, clean up your pubes, find some soft lighting, and don’t do that cringey thing where you put a coke can or a ruler next to it. We get it. It’s massive.






"Tone Bones is an international sex work expert and educator, and private fitness and sex ed coach. As a pleasure-seeker, he reviews and tests different adult products to check if they are worth using"
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