Best Ashley Madison Alternatives: Top 10 Discreet Dating Sites

Best Ashley Madison Alternatives: Top 10 Discreet Dating Sites

Looking for the best alternative to Ashley Madison? You’ve come to the right place.  Whether you’re married and looking for discreet affairs or just want to inject some fun into your life, there’s plenty of affair dating sites and Ashley Madison alternatives out there worth checking out. And guess what… We’ve taken the time to […]

Looking for the best alternative to Ashley Madison? You’ve come to the right place. 

Whether you’re married and looking for discreet affairs or just want to inject some fun into your life, there’s plenty of affair dating sites and Ashley Madison alternatives out there worth checking out.

And guess what…

We’ve taken the time to review the top 10 affair dating sites that serve as excellent alternatives to Ashley Madison.

Looking for a casual hookup? A short term FWB? Something a little more long term? These married dating sites have you covered. 

So, without further ado – let’s dive into our list of the top 10 Ashley Madison alternatives, starting with our top pick, AdultFriendFinder.

Best Ashley Madison Alternatives in 2023

First Look

  1. AdultFriendFinder: Best alternative to Ashley Madison
  2. Seeking Benefits: Affordable alternative to Ashley Madison
  3. Victoria Milan: Best for privacy
  4. Searching for Singles: Best for casual hookups
  5. No Strings Attached: Quick & easy affairs
  6. Feeld: Best for Open-Minded Individuals
  7. Elite Alternative to Ashley Madison
  8. Find kink & BDSM flavored affairs
  9. WhatsYourPrice: Most Innovative Alternative to Ashley Madison
  10. Tinder: Best free option

1. AdultFriendFinder – Best Alternative to Ashley Madison Overall



  • Over 80 million members
  • Advanced search and filter tools
  • Live webcam chat rooms and forums
  • Very x-rated and sex positive
  • Threesome friendly


  • Some fake profiles and scammers
  • Not designed exclusively for discreet affairs

Price points:

  • $39.95/month (month-to-month)
  • $26.95/month (3-month subscription)
  • $19.95/month (12-month subscription)

Of all Ashley Madison alternatives, none are as popular as AdultFriendFinder.

Seriously, this is a truly unique adult dating site that offers a range of special features for users interested in discreet dating and no-strings-attached hookups

One of the most notable features is the live webcam chat rooms and forums, which provide users with a platform to interact with each other in real-time (something you won’t get with most Ashley Madison alternatives).

In addition to the live chat rooms and forums, AdultFriendFinder also offers a variety of search filters to help users find exactly what they’re looking for. This includes filters for location, age, and sexual preferences, among others.

Another unique feature that separates AFF from other sites like Ashley Madison are the free adult chat rooms.

Finally, users can create and join interest-based groups, which can be a great way to meet others with similar interests and explore their sexuality in a supportive and non-judgmental environment.

Whether you’re looking for a casual hookup or something more serious, AdultFriendFinder is hands-down one of the best alternatives to Ashley Madison!

Join AdultFriendFinder, one of the best alternatives to Ashley Madison

2. Secret Benefits – Best Alternative to Ashley Madison for Affordability



  • Fast sign-up process
  • No monthly membership fees (credit system)
  • Thousands of verified members
  • Private photo albums for naughty pics
  • Trans-friendly
  • Credits never expire


  • Some members are looking for sugar daddies
  • Some fake profiles and scammers

Price Points:

  • 100 credit for $59 
  • 500 credit for $169
  • 1000 credits for $289

Seeking Benefits is a discreet dating site that has quickly gained popularity as one of the best alternatives to Ashley Madison. 

It caters strongly to individuals who are looking for affairs or casual relationships outside of their marriages or committed relationships.

The site offers a range of special features designed to make discreet dating and affairs easier and more enjoyable. One of the most notable features is the discreet mode, which allows users to keep their profile and activity private from other members. 

Another unique feature of Seeking Benefits is the “TravelingMan” option, which allows members to search for partners in different locations before they travel. 

This feature can be very useful for those who want to arrange a discreet date or affair in advance – making it one of the best sites like Ashley Madison for business men/women.

Seeking Benefits also offers a “Favorites” list, which allows members to keep track of profiles they’re interested in.

That said, some members are escorts in disguise, something to be mindful of!

>>Related Reading: Best Escort Sites

Overall, Seeking Benefits is one of the better Ashley Madison alternatives for individuals looking for discreet affairs or casual relationships. 

While it may not be for everyone, the site’s large user base, communication tools, and special features make it a strong alternative to Ashley Madison.

Join Seeking Benefits – one of the best affair dating sites for easy hookups

3. Victoria Milan – Best Ashley Madison Alternative for Privacy



  • Advanced privacy tools
  • Over 7 million members
  • In-depth filter options (sex drive, height, etc.)
  • Designed for discreet affairs
  • Android and iOS mobile app


  • Limited free features
  • Membership fees can be pricey
  • Some fake profiles reported by users

Price Points:

  • $34.99/month (month-to-month)
  • $59.99/month (3-month subscription)
  • $46.99/month (6-month subscription)

Victoria Milan is a discreet dating site built around privacy, security, and anonymity

One such feature is anonymous payments using Victoria Milan gift cards or PayPal, giving users a more discreet and less traceable way of purchasing credits. 

The discreet cheating site also supports private photo albums, letting users choose who gets to see their photos.

This popular Ashley Madison alternative also supports a panic button. When pressed, you’ll be instantly brought to a different page (typically YouTube).

Trust us, this feature can really come in handy if your spouse or partner walks in on you while browsing the site and isn’t something offered by other sites like Ashley Madison.

Additionally, the site has a mobile app for convenient on-the-go access.

Overall, Victoria Milan is one of the top Ashley Madison alternatives for those seeking a secure and discreet cheating site.

Find discreet affairs on Victoria Milan – one the top Ashley Madison alternatives

4. Searching for Singles – Best Ashley Madison Alternative for Casual Hookups



  • Read messages for free
  • See who’s viewed your profile for free
  • Rapid fire ‘Match Game’
  • No monthly subscription required
  • Built for easy hookups


  • No free messaging
  • Not as discreet as Victoria Milan

Price Points:

  • $8.95-$12.95/month (5-15 free messages/month)
  • $0.80-$1.50/message 

Compared to other top Ashley Madison alternatives, Searching for Singles is refreshingly simple and doesn’t bog you down in any of the bells and whistles you’ll find at other affair dating sites.

Sign-up is quick and easy and you can even see who’s visited your profile and read all received messages for free.

You will have to buy credits, however, to send messages.

Searching for Singles offers the standard search filters to sort through profiles, including location, age range, physical attributes, and relationship status. 

Members can also upload private photos and choose who has access to them, which allows for more discreet and selective sharing of personal information. 

Overall, Searching for Singles is a solid Ashley Madison alternative for those seeking discreet dating sites.

Best of all? You can see your matches without spending a dime!

Join Searching for Singles – one of the best alternatives to Ashley Madison for affairs

5. No Strings Attached – Best Ashley Madison Alternative for One-Off Affairs



  • Simple and easy-to-use interface
  • Advanced search options
  • Available on both desktop and mobile devices
  • Wide range of communication tools
  • 800,000+ users submitted photos & videos


  • Only paid members can send messages
  • Monthly membership fees can be costly
  • Few members in smaller towns

Price Points:

  • $29.95/month (1-month membership)
  • $19.98/month (3-month membership)
  • $16.65/month (12-month membership)

Helping people hookup for over 14 years, No Strings Attached is another Ashley Madison alternativethat’s  popular among affair seekers.

The site provides advanced search options that allow users to filter potential partners based on criteria such as location, physical attributes, and relationship status, and what kind of arrangement they’re after.

Members can communicate privately via messaging and chat features and even have video chat sessions with their matches. 

The site is also available on mobile devices via the No Strings Attached app, allowing users to stay connected with potential partners even while on the go.

No Strings Attached is arguably the best alternative to Ashley Madison for individuals who are looking for casual hookups and not something long term. 

The site is also very naughty in nature, and many members even upload nude photographs. In fact, there’s over 800k photos – much more than most affair dating sites.

Join No Strings Attached – one of the top Ashley Madison Alternatives for FWBs

6. Feeld – Open-Minded Ashley Madison Alternative



  • 21 gender and sexuality options
  • Find your next threesome
  • Hangout space for poly couples
  • “Incognito” mode provides extra privacy
  • Has a growing user base and expanding globally


  • Some users might find the app overwhelming
  • Not for the Vanilla affair seeker

Price Points:

  • Basic features are free
  • Premium membership: $12.49/week or $24.49/90 days

Of all sites like Ashley Madison, none are as unique as Feeld – an online dating site that caters to individuals and couples looking to explore their sexuality with like-minded people. 

The app offers an “Incognito” mode that allows users to hide their profile from Facebook friends or LinkedIn contacts, ensuring maximum discretion. 

Users can filter their search results by location, age, and preferences, and can create a profile as an individual or a couple.

In addition to the standard chat tool, Feeld offers video calls for a more immersive and interactive experience – a rare feature among the best alternatives to Ashley Madison.

There’s also tons of verified users on Feeld, making it one of the top Ashley Madison alternatives for safety.

As an Ashley Madison alternative, Feeld offers a unique space for those seeking non-traditional relationships and sexual encounters. 

Looking for discreet dating sites that caters to open-minded individuals or couples? Feeld might just be the platform for you. 

Explore your sexuality with Feeld – the best alternative to Ashley Madison for threesomes

7. – Best Alternative to Ashley Madison for Luxury Dating


  • Luxury & Elite dating
  • ID verification available
  • Strict verification process
  • Advanced search filters
  • Privacy features
  • Very attractive users


  • Expensive subscription plans
  • Free users can’t send messages

Price points:

  • $89.95/mo (1-month membership)
  • $79.95/mo (3-month membership)
  • $69.95/mo (6-month membership)
  • $49.95/mo (12-month membership)

If you’re looking to connect with success or seriously attractive singles, then is hands down the best alternative to Ashley Madison.

It has over 22 million users, with most of its members located within the USA!

Often used as an alternative to Ashley Madison, the site strives to connect successful men with attractive young women.

Unlike other sites like Ashley Madison, a membership is quite expensive and we only recommend it to affair seekers who have deep pockets! 

The site has a few unique features that make it stand out from top Ashley Madison alternatives. 

For starters, a Diamond membership provides users with access to exclusive events and fully-verified profiles

This membership level also allows users to see who has viewed their profile and the ability to browse profiles anonymously. 

Unlike other dating apps like Ashley Madison, has an online gift shop where you can purchase perfumes, lingerie, chocolates and other goodies for members that catch your eye.

Serious members can even undergo a background check process. Once complete, this significantly increases profile visibility!

To be clear, no other sites like Ashley Madison offer such a high level of member verification.

Visit – the best alternative to Ashley Madison for luxury dating

8. – Best Ashley Madison Alternative for Kinky Affairs


  • Kink & fetish themed
  • Video chat tools
  • Extremely detailed search & filter tool
  • Affordable subscriptions
  • Very open-minded community


  • Some escorts
  • Watch out for inactive profiles & bots

Price Points:


  • $19.95/mo (1-month membership) 
  • $11.99/mo (3-month membership)
  • $8.95/mo (12-month membership)


  • $29.95/mo (1-month membership)
  • $19.99/mo (3-month membership)
  • $13.43/mo (12-month membership) is the best alternative to Ashley Madison if you’re looking to explore Kink, Fetish, and BDSM related fun.

In fact, is one of the most popular adult social networking sites for alternative lifestyles (discreet affairs included).

One of the unique features of is its fetish search feature, which allows users to search for other members based on their specific fetish preferences. 


This tool comes with hundreds of options and covers every kink and proclivity you can think of. You can even find members who get off on being with married people – something you won’t find at other affair dating sites!

Another special feature of is its Hotlist feature, which allows users to save profiles that they are interested in for later. 

This best Ashley Madison alternative also provides a range of BDSM resources, including articles and blogs, that can help users learn more about alternative lifestyles and sexual practices.

In fact, compared to all sites like Ashley Madison, none are as open-minded as

Overall, is the alternative to Ashley Madison for individuals interested in alternative lifestyles and looking for a discreet platform to connect with like-minded individuals. 

Join today – the Best Alternative to Ashley Madison for Kinky Affairs

9. WhatsYourPrice – Top Ashley Madison Alternative for Guaranteed Dates

whats your price


  • Unique concept
  • Discreet
  • Bid on dates
  • User-friendly
  • Large user base
  • Free for women


  • Some dates can be expensive
  • Limited search options

Price points:

  • Women can use the site for free
  • Men must purchase credits to bid on dates, with packages starting at $50 for 100 credits
  • Most dates cost between $50 and $180

In addition to its unique concept of allowing members to bid on dates, WhatsYourPrice also offers some special features to help users navigate the dating process. 

One of these features is “Date Feedback,” which allows users to leave feedback on their dates. 

Another special feature of WhatsYourPrice is “Background Verification.” Members can opt to undergo a background check to verify their identity and increase their credibility on the site. 

Better still, WhatsYourPrice stands alone among top Ashley Madison alternatives when it comes to guaranteed dates.

Once a date offer (in the form of money) has been received, you’re guaranteed a night out on the town – something other affair dating sites can’t offer.

If you’re looking for unique and discreet dating sites that function as an Ashley Madison alternative, then look no further than WhatsYourPrice. 

Join WhatsYourPrice – the best alternative to Ashley Madison for guaranteed dates

10. Tinder – Free Ashley Madison Alternative



  • Large user base
  • Easy to use with a simple swipe interface
  • Basic features are free
  • Free unlimited messages
  • Decent premium features
  • Designed for hookups


  • Profiles can be limited
  • Not at all discreet

Price points:


  • FREE


  • $9.99/month for users under 30
  • $19.99/month for users 30 and over


  • $29.99/month

Of all sites like Ashley Madison, none are as popular as Tinder.

The platform is visited by over 80 million users weekly and facilitates thousands of hookups every day!

The Ashley Madison Alternative is even equipped with a Passport feature, which allows users to match with potential partners in other locations. 

Another special feature of Tinder is the Swipe Surge feature. This shows when there is a spike in user activity in your area, giving you the chance to match with more people, which is particularly useful during peak dating hours or events, such as concerts or festivals.

Finally, Tinder’s Smart Photos feature automatically orders your photos to show your best side first (something you won’t get from other top Ashley Madison alternatives).

As a dating app that’s become a household name, Tinder is a popular Ashley Madison alternative, particularly for casual hookups. 

That said, the app isn’t very discreet and it’ll be hard to hide your identity while using.

Still, Tinder is a great Ashley Madison alternative for those looking for casual hookups and a large pool of potential matches. 

Join Tinder – the most popular of all Ashley Madison alternatives

Best Alternative to Ashley Madison FAQs

What’s the Best Ashley Madison Alternative?

The best Ashley Madison alternative is Victoria Milan due to the high quality site and the fact that it’s geared more towards the affluent, jet-setting crowd.

If you’re looking for some kinky or fetish-related fun, then is one of the top Ashley Madison alternatives.

What Are the Best Affair Dating Sites?

The best Affair Dating Sites are AdultFriendFinder and Victoria Milan. Both sites are popular platforms for cheats and affair seekers

In fact, the two are often considered the top Ashley Madison alternatives for extramarital sex.

Are there any sites like Ashley Madison?

Yes, there are sites like Ashley Madison, the best being Victoria Milan, Adult Friend Finder, and Secret Benefits.

Interested in threesome? Then and Feeld are the top Ashley Madison alternatives. 

Is There Something Better Than Ashley Madison?

Yes, many people believe Victoria Milan is better than Ashely Madison. While it doesn’t have as many members, it does have better privacy tools.

For easy hookups, Adult Friend Finder is the best of all sites like Ashley Madison.

Is There a Dating Site for Married people?

Yes, there is dating for married people, the most popular being Adult Friend Finder and Feeld. Both platforms support couples profiles and are popular among threesome seekers and swingers.

That said, both sites are also popular Ashley Madison alternatives among affair seekers.

Is There a Free Alternative to Ashley Madison?

Yes, there is a free alternative to Ashley Madison. It’s Tinder! Of all sites like Ashley Madison, however, Tinder is the least discreet and you run the biggest risk of being caught.

Although it has a smaller user base, Feeld lets users message for free – a rarity among top Ashley Madison alternatives.

How Do I Know If Online Affair Dating is Right for Me?

There are certainly many factors to take into consideration before starting an affair, and this is more or less subjective. Writing out pros and cons can help as would discussing this seriously with your partner.

How Do I Make Sure I Don’t Get Caught on Sites like Ashley Madison?

No matter which site like Ashley Madison you choose, make sure its security and privacy settings are secure and that your payment method is set to make any transactions as discreet and private as possible.

Of course, the best way not to get caught is by being open with your partner about what you want. Not sure how to go about this, read more about Ethical non-Monogamy.

(PS: of all top Ashley Madison alternatives, Feeld is the most open to Ethical non-monogamy)

Best Ashley Madison Alternatives: Final Verdict

Of the sites like Ashley Madison we’ve reviewed, we feel Adult Friend Finder is the best. The site boasts a massive, horny user base looking for discreet affairs and hookups.

If discreet dating sites are more your thing, then you can’t go wrong with Victoria Milan and its host of privacy tools.

No matter which alternative to Ashley Madison you choose, stay safe, have fun, and don’t get caught!

About the Author thepleasureseeker